You really coming over, don't trick.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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