someone get that fucking seahorse.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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