U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
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