I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
