We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Blood and glitter go together right?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
