Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Boobs are out for the taking
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize