Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Randomize
