so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
