Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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