So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
