I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
This show inspires me to have sex in space
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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