this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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