I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
