Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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