I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
He did a backflip because drugs
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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