I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
