I need help removing her.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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