I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I wish my penis had an off switch
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
