i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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