I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
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