My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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