Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
