"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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