So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
cat food counts as protein by the way
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
so much tequila, so little girl.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize
