I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
