Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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