Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
