Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
well you can't waste a boner
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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