You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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