I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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