this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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