I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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