i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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