idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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