my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize