yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
