I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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