Say something about gay babies.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
