I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
