If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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