I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
