Pregnant stripper...not hot.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
