so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize