this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
