Screwed.edu
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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