we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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