I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
