yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
