just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
kristin has been a bad kristin
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize