I could have mohawked her pubes.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
