Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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