so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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