Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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